Warmth
by TruIntentions
Summary: Kakashi has been brooding over something for the last few years. Now the war's about to begin, and Naruto is leaving on his S-rank mission. Will he be able to get everything off his mind before it's too late? Shounen-Ai. Nothing explicit.


Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto or any of it's characters. I think you'd know if I did. :)

* * *

He couldn't remember when it had started. What Kakashi did remember was that he had never thought to fall in love with his student. His very young, _male_ student.

He could see _why_ he had fallen in love, though. Naruto had the natural ability to make people care about him and see things in the same way he did. Only with Kakashi, it had worked a little too well. Instead of a close friendship, he had started to care too much, more than was usual for a teacher towards his student or even for friends.

As soon as he had recognized those emotions, he had distanced himself, had willingly sent him off to study with Jiraiya. Well, _willingly_ might not be the correct word. He had accepted it. Accepted it as necessary, as a way for Naruto to develop into the person he was today.

During that trip, Kakashi had tried so many ways to forget him. And, finally, two years after the other had left the village, he had felt fairly confident that those emotions would stay gone, or at the very least remain platonic. The opposite had happened.

It started with the small gift his student brought back. The ridiculous hope arose that _maybe_ he cared for him, too. That this wasn't an impossible love. After all, he was the only that had received a gift. After crudely crushing those emotions once more and regaining his confidence in his restraint, he had offered to train Naruto. He had thought that if he acted more as a teacher, that the nature of his feelings might change into something more… accepted.

He should have known that things wouldn't work that way. The only result of that training, except for Naruto's obvious success, was that his feelings returned at full throttle. How could it be any different? He had spent weeks with him, nearly alone except for Tenzou. In such close contact, day in, day out, seeing him do what he did best, that never-ending strength, he should have known he wouldn't be able to resist the pull.

The mask helped in covering his emotions. So did his life as a shinobi and countless years in ANBU. He didn't think anyone knew or even suspected how he felt. Whenever something happened, or when the jealousy sparked, he had always managed to keep his face neutral. Even if he managed to keep his expressions in check, that was not always the case with his actions.

His favorite moments were whenever he was able to catch Naruto. After his first true battle with Sasuke, a lot of times during the training, after his talk with Nagato. They were an excuse to touch him, as well as one of the only chances he had to show his emotions, other than the occasional pats on the head. Along with his cerulean eyes, Naruto's hair was what he loved most about his appearance. He felt they were a reflection of Naruto's natural vivacity.

But no matter how much he loved him and how much his possessiveness would appear, he would never allow himself to restrain his student. What he said that day was true: Naruto was able to surpass the Fourth Hokage. And in many ways had already done so. To accomplish all that, he needed to be given attention and training, but more than all that, Naruto deserved the chance and the freedom to act out on his instincts, on his sense of justice.

Still, he refused to voice his feeling aloud or admit them to anyone. Doing so would make it final. And in the happy occasion that his friends accepted it, they would most likely only push him to confess. That was something he would never do. Not willingly at least. He had never considered himself to be a particularly cowardly man, but even the thought of being rejected, nearly paralyzed him. He would much rather be left unknowing.

That didn't mean it was easy to keep these emotions silent. He had nearly blurted it out so many times. Sometimes the reason was jealousy. Like the time when Naruto went after Gaara so desperately. He liked Gaara, respected him as Kazekage and was grateful for the bond he had formed with Naruto as another Jinchuuriki. But… seeing the one he loved willing to risk everything for another wasn't particularly easy.

He felt the same way about Naruto wanting to save Sasuke. He wanted nothing better than to have Sasuke back and see Naruto and Sakura happy again. Although there was a small part of him that wished Naruto wasn't quite so enthusiastic in his quest. He supposed that anything less would simply not be like Naruto. There were times when he wondered if Naruto loved Sasuke. Not just as a brother, but as something more. Then he immediately discarded those thoughts. They caused him too much pain. Even if he didn't really show it on his face.

"Kakashi-sensei."

Sakura's sudden voice startled him out of his musings. He almost narrowed his eyes at her. She was another reason for his jealousy. Especially since she confessed her feelings to Naruto. Even if it had mostly been a lie to keep Naruto from going after Sasuke, Kakashi had seen a certain amount of truth in it. And despite his usual excellent observatory powers, he couldn't say whether Naruto's feelings had changed from the crush he used to have into something deeper or into friendship. He hoped it was the latter, but he didn't _know_.

This was something that annoyed him. Ever since he had fallen in love, he had lost the ability to be completely objective about Naruto. He could still see his faults, so love hadn't made him entirely blind. Thank god. But he couldn't judge any of Naruto's emotions.

Before he had these feelings he would have been able to tell in a flash who Naruto was interested in. But now, he interpreted every single action as an expression of a secret love. Hell, at several points in time he had suspected Gaara, Neji, Sai, Iruka and even Yamato as people Naruto might have been interested in. And then he didn't even mention all those who might have feelings for Naruto.

All in all, he was a mess and couldn't see how he didn't trip over his feet every time he was training or fighting alongside Naruto. That was how distracted his student made him. That was how out of character he had been ever since these disturbing emotions had started to show themselves.

He focused on his other student standing before him. "Sakura. What is it?"

"Tsunade-sama had something to tell you. Can you stop by her office?"

He sighed. "Sure. Later."

Kakashi jumped onto a nearby rooftop, gave a final wave and made his way to the Godaime's quarters, with a little detour, of course... He was either going to be assigned a new mission, but he doubted that since the war was nearing. If it wasn't about a mission, it would probably be about Naruto.

His suspicions where confirmed when he reached the Hokage's office. (Two hours late.) Konoha's recent hero had been a topic he had tried to avoid whenever in Tsunade-sama's presence. Kakashi knew they had to hide him away when the war started and he also knew that he himself couldn't go with Naruto since he had to play another part in the war.

"Who would you suggest we send along with Naruto? I have already decided on Yamashiro Aoba since he is a sensory type and would undoubtedly be useful. I want two or three others to join them. Obviously, you aren't a possibility. But other than his usual friends you're the one who knows him best, so I wanted to ask your opinion." Was it just him, or did her eyes hold a touch of sympathy when she said that? Probably just his imagination.

Kakashi considered the matter. Who would be the best choice to not only protect Naruto, but also be able to guide him? He immediately decided on Gai. Not only because Kakashi knew Gai was interested in someone else and therefore wouldn't make a pass at Naruto, but also because Gai was someone he trusted nearly unconditionally. The second person was more difficult. But after some slight inner conflict, he chose Tenzou.

While he couldn't know for sure how Naruto felt about 'Yamato-taichou', or if Tenzou was the one interested, his colleague _was_ an excellent shinobi, with the added advantage of being a Wood Element user. He had also been of great help during Naruto's previous training and unless Kakashi was mistaken, Naruto would be attempting to learn to control the Kyuubi on that remote island. Besides, Naruto trusted him.

When he told Tsunade his choices, she considered them for a moment, then nodded.

"When will they be leaving?"

"In about a week. I'll first need to tell the four of them. Then they will need time to prepare. You won't be seeing any of them until after the war―or during it, maybe―so if there is anything you need to tell one of them, I suggest you do so now, before it's too late." There was that look again. Either Kakashi really was paranoid, or Tsunade-sama really did suspect something of his feelings. _Damn_.

"I doubt that will be necessary, though I will make sure to see them off along with everyone else." He gave an eye-smile and as he made his way to the door after having excused himself, he pulled out Icha Icha Tactics. Though he feared his attempt to look absorbed in the book he was holding and uninterested in Naruto's coming trip, was sadly seen through. He almost turned around and asked why she would possibly support him or at least be understanding. Was there hope after all? But quickly discarded the thought. That uncertainty was too much unlike how others knew him. They all expected him to be confident and if they had known he had fallen love, would think he'd be able to confess without much trouble. After all, he'd simply shake it off in case he was rejected.

Right?

* * *

Two days passed before he heard the news of Naruto's new S-rank mission. Of course, he was told by Naruto himself who couldn't wait to tell his sensei of his important task. It was only a small consolidation to know he was the first to hear of it.

"Ne, Kakashi-sensei, ne, ne, it's great isn't it? I finally get my very own S-rank mission. Of course, Yamato-taichou and Gai-sensei are gonna be there and some other guy I don't know―Aoi or something―but baa-chan said I was the only one who could do this!"

"It's great, Naruto. I knew you'd get one soon." He rustled Naruto's hair, wishing he could pull up his hitai-ate so his Sharingan could carve this moment into his memory. Naruto looked so eager and happy his eyes sparkled even more than usual and he practically bounced with energy.

Kakashi smiled. "When will you be leaving?"

"Not sure. Yamato-taichou said he'll decide on a date tomorrow." Naruto's eyebrows scrunched together a little, then his eyes widened and he looked up at his sensei again. "Ano sa, Ano sa, Kakashi-sensei, will you come see me off?"

"If I'm not on a mission, sure." Kakashi almost snorted, knowing he wouldn't miss this for the world. After all, there was no saying what might happen during the war. He might get killed, Naruto might get captured. Neither of them might make it back. He would treasure what was possibly the last chance to see Naruto.

"Thanks, Kakashi-sensei! I'm going to tell everyone else. Hehe, I'll bet they'll be really jealous." He ran past Kakashi. Once he was sure he couldn't be seen, Kakashi allowed his eye to close and small flicker of pain to show across his face.

"Kakashi-sensei!" Kakashi's eye shot open and he turned to Naruto who was waving enthusiastically from the end of the street. "I'll see you tomorrow!" Then he ran off again.

* * *

True to his word, the next day, Naruto chased him down to tell him they'd be leaving on Friday at dawn. Four days from then. Kakashi smiled, told him he'd try to be there (as if he wouldn't), told Naruto he had somewhere to be―which was a blatant lie―and rushed off. He just needed a moment to decide what to do. And hanging around Naruto wasn't the best way to make a decision.

After having talked to his student yesterday, the finality of things sank in. They really might never see each other again. Did he truly want to die without having told his most important person his feelings? There was a chance―a very small chance―that Naruto cared for him in that way as well. Besides, even if he was rejected, at least he could die without any regrets.

And what if Naruto was killed? Without knowing if he felt the same or not, it would make forgetting him nearly impossible. Not that it was possible to forget him, but at least he'd have some kind of closure.

But if he was rejected, and they both lived to tell the tale, wouldn't that make things hard afterwards? Or even during the war? Kakashi had no doubt that Naruto would find out about the battle going on at one point during his 'S-rank mission' and would then immediately try to join in. What if they met each other then? Would he be able to stay concentrated? Kakashi was confident in his skills as a shinobi, but the truth of the matter was that being around Naruto affected him. More than it should.

Well, even if he was rejected, he could simply ask for a transfer afterwards. Or he could join ANBU and they wouldn't have to work together anymore. If it was too hard on them, that is. Kakashi had no plans on never being able to see Naruto again. Whether he was shot down or not, he wanted to be able to watch over his student―ex-student―one way or another. Be it as a sensei or as a lover.

These thoughts kept plaguing him the following four days.

When it was time for Naruto and the three others to leave, he slowly made his way over to the gates. He briefly contemplated not showing up. This wasn't going to be easy. He had finally decided on not telling Naruto anything. But these past couple of days had shaken him up so much that he could feel his mask slipping.

Arriving at the gates, he saw no one.

"Yo, Kakashi-sensei!"

Kakashi who had just been wondering if he'd gotten the date wrong, froze at the voice behind him, took a deep―yet unnoticed―breath, then turned around.

There was Naruto. The Number One Hyperactive, Knucklehead Ninja stood there with a wide smile. But as obtuse as Kakashi usually was about anything concerning Naruto, even he noticed that the grin was forced and used to try and cover up Naruto's nervousness. Still, Kakashi decided to ignore it.

"Naruto." He eye-smiled. "Where is everyone?"

Naruto laughed nervously and raked his hand through his hair. Kakashi wanted to sigh. He'd probably mixed up the dates and was now too scared to admit it.

"Well, y'see…" Naruto began. When he didn't continue Kakashi sighed loudly.

"It's tomorrow, isn't it? The day you're leaving?"

Blue eyes widened. "How did you know?"

"It's not really hard to figure out, seeing as how nervous you are." He smiled. "It's fine. I needed to get up early anyway. I have an appointment with the Hokage later on."

He walked towards Naruto, patted his head and lifted his hand to make the seal for teleportation. Just before he left, he felt something take hold of him. To his surprise Naruto had grabbed him around the waist and seemed like he was holding on for dear life.

Not trusting his voice not to shake, Kakashi remained silent. When a couple of minutes had passed and nothing had changed, Kakashi whispered Naruto's name. His student flinched and quickly let go.

He pasted another smile on his face―even more forced than the previous one. "Oh. Sorry, Kakashi-sensei, don't know what came over me." He laughed. "Guess I just, um, I just…" He trailed off and the grin slid off his face. At that Kakashi's heart twitched.

"Idiot." That was all he said. Kakashi then threw one arm around him and hugged Naruto close. He wasn't quite confident enough to wrap both arms around him, so he figured this was a good enough start.

At first, Naruto stood frozen against him and Kakashi feared he had somehow made a mistake. Though he didn't see how that was possible as the other had hugged him first. But suddenly he felt hands grab the back of his vest and he was pulled flush against his younger student. He almost didn't dare to breathe, in fear of shaking Naruto out of whatever trance he was in.

His mind whirled with the possible implications of Naruto's actions. Slowly, though, he calmed down enough to think things over logically.

He wouldn't be able to let him go. Kakashi knew that. If he did this now… It would be too late. For both of them. There was no going back. Most would probably condemn them. It wouldn't be easy. They would argue. They might even grow apart. There was no guarantee everything would turn out right.

But even if he knew all that, how could he give up on him? Why should he? Whenever he saw him around―giving everything he had, trying to cheer everyone up, trying to prove his worth―something glowed in his chest. As cheesy as that may sound, that feeling, that warm, warm sensation, would never go away. Nor would he ever want it to.

Naruto was _warmth_.

He managed to draw everyone towards him. The lonelier or sadder or more depressed one was, the harder it was to resist that warmth. Kakashi was a prime example. His past may not have been as traumatizing as Naruto's or Gaara's. After all, he'd never been ostracized―hated―by an entire village, but it had been… difficult all the same. He'd lost a lot of people, a lot of loved ones. And for a long time after he hadn't really allowed himself to care too much about, well, about everything. After having met Naruto, though, he'd relaxed, allowed his emotions to play a bigger part in his life. Some might say that wasn't the best course of action for a shinobi, but all he knew was that he was a lot happier now.

Naruto was the one who'd made that happen.

All of a sudden, he could care less about what others would think, or him possibly being rejected. He only wanted to let Naruto know how special he was to him.

"Naruto."

"Kakashi-sensei?" Once again beautiful blue eyes looked up at him.

"Have I ever told you that I love you?" Kakashi might have decided to tell him, but this really was the best he could do.

Those eyes grew larger and larger, but then suddenly dimmed again.

"Well, yeah, once. Y'know, during training. I really like you, too, sensei. You're a great teacher and shinobi." Maybe it was for the best that Naruto didn't interpret his words right. But something… sad in that look made him push through.

"Naruto, Naruto." Kakashi shook his head in mock disappointment. "That wasn't how I meant it. I love you. I love you the way a man would love a woman, though I suppose that wouldn't exactly apply to us."

Kakashi waited, then waited some more for an answer. Or a slap in the face. Or a disgusted cry and seeing Naruto run off. When five minutes had passed and Naruto still hadn't said a word, Kakashi decided he'd been patient enough.

"You know, an answer might be nice. Baka."

Then Naruto pushed away and in typical Naruto panic mode shook his head and waved his hands trying to defend himself. "I-I'm not… It's just… Y-You never s-s-said…" He took a deep in an attempt to calm down. "It's just a shock. You know, you _really_ should've told me earlier, Kakashi-sensei," he said in a reprimanding way. "At least then, we could've been together sooner." Naruto sighed. "I'm leaving tomorrow and I'm sure you've noticed, but a war's coming. We haven't got that much time!"

Kakashi's eyes widened. Unless he was an idiot―and he certainly wasn't―this meant that Naruto cared for him as well. More than that, _loved_ him, too. His heart wasn't sure whether it should beat uncontrollably or calm down out of relief.

"Maa, Naruto. It'll be just fine. I don't want to brag―" Naruto snorted. "―but I like to think of myself as somewhat strong and I know _you're_ pretty powerful yourself. So we won't have any trouble coming through this war in one piece―well, at the very least we'll be alive."

During his little speech, Naruto had sidled back to his side and allowed Kakashi to put his arms around him again.

"You know, I couldn't stand it if I lost you now. I finally know that you love me, too," Naruto mumbled.

A moment of silence.

"I was planning to confess today, too. But you beat me to it," he grumbled.

Kakashi laughed. "Actually I had decided not to say anything, but after you hugged me, I found I didn't care whether you rejected me or not. I simply had to tell you."

"Bet you're glad you did, huh?"

A squeeze. "Of course."

A couple of minutes passed before Kakashi realized that they were standing at the front gates. It really was something of a miracle that no one had come across them yet in a somewhat… compromising stance.

It wasn't like Kakashi particularly wanted to hide their relationship, at least not from their friends. But at the moment Naruto was famous enough that not much would be needed to spread the news in more than two hours.

Kakashi rather enjoyed his life―especially now. And even though he didn't consider himself a coward, that didn't mean he wasn't a bit apprehensive about Iruka and Tsunade-sama hearing about him and Naruto.

"Ne, Naruto, how about we relocate?" Cerulean eyes slowly opened. "I don't think you've ever seen my apartment." Before Naruto could react Kakashi had formed the seal and transported them to his kitchen. He'd actually aimed for the bedroom―yes, he was somewhat of a pervert―but the kitchen table was nice, too.

When he glanced down at Naruto, he saw the boy staring at his surroundings in wonder. Naruto slowly walked through his apartment taking in everything around him.

"This place really suits you, sensei. There's not too much stuff laying around, but there're some personal things here that… I don't know. It's just you." He smiled sheepishly, wrapping his arms around himself.

Kakashi smiled, again, through his mask. He immediately went over to Naruto and hugged him. Having decided that that felt rather nice, he figured he might as well try something a little different.

Carefully, so as not to scare off the younger boy, he lowered his head and pressed his masked lips to Naruto's. It would have been quite funny to see the shinobi's eyes widen in shock, if Kakashi had not been preoccupied with the thought that this was hardly enough. And he didn't even mean it in a perverted way. Not really, at least.

Without hesitation Kakashi pulled down his mask and this time he could feel the soft warmth of Naruto's lips against his. He liked it. Then Naruto's arms grabbed hold of the back of his vest. He liked it very much indeed.

While Kakashi had had sex before, those had been rather brief encounters. He'd never felt comfortable enough with someone to actually show his face to them.

He had been somewhat predictable throughout his life. Not in battle, but in his interactions with people. He was sure that whenever people thought about what kind of relationships Kakashi might have, they were reasonably correct. The same could be said about possible conjectures of his personality. But all of that changed after he fell in love with Naruto. Especially these last few months.

This sounded rather cliché, but he was sure that if someone had told him ten, or even five years ago, that one day he would be standing in his living room laughing about the smallest thing and Konoha's number one surprising ninja wrapped in his arms… Well, he wasn't sure what he would have done, but it would have involved either Raikiri or at the very least a, ahem, _gentle_ reminder for that person not to forget his medication next time.

Still, none of that mattered right now. All that did was the thought and feeling of Naruto so close to him.

After a little while, he gently pulled away, deciding to give Naruto the chance to finally see the face he had failed to unmask numerous times over the years. The reaction was worth it. He didn't get the open stare and mouth he had somewhat expected. Naruto looked for a moment, then the corners of his mouth pulled up in the sweetest smile Kakashi could ever have imagined. And to his surprise, his student leaned up on his toes to press his lips to Kakashi's in a tender gesture.

"Thank you," Naruto said, still smiling. Then a mischievous glint appeared in his eyes. He patted Kakashi's shoulder understandingly. "You're pretty handsome, you know. I'm not surprised you decided to wear a mask. Bet you had to beat off the girls with a stick when you were young. Must have been tough on you."

"But of course. I still do. There are a lot of beautiful women in Konoha. You better hope none of them seduce me away from you." The moment he said it, he wanted to take the words back and at the same time hit himself in the head.

Naruto's eyes dimmed and an uncertain look appeared in his eyes. And even though it was only slightly, he felt Naruto's hold of his shirt weaken. Kakashi cursed inwardly. No matter how strong Naruto might seem to the world, he was rather sensitive about certain things. Emotions and relationships were definitely among them.

"Naruto. I'm sorry. I didn't mean it like that." He hugged him tighter, desperate to get his feelings across properly. "You have no idea how long I've wanted you. Do you really think I could or would ever give you up? I love you and I know now that you love me, too. If you even knew half of how happy that makes me… I love you, Uzumaki Naruto, son of Namikaze Minato and Uzumaki Kushina, godson of Jiraiya, favourite of the current Hokage and future Rokudaime Hokage. _Only you_."

Naruto didn't respond.

Just when Kakashi wanted to say more, to apologize again, he felt the other's arms tighten around him.

Again, that feeling of warmth spread through him. And even though a war was about to break out, at that moment he felt truly at peace.

* * *

A/N: What did you think? :)

It's my first story, so I hope it's at least a little bit good. If you feel like it, please leave a review. It'd be greatly appreciated. :)

PS Naruto does know about the war here, but I just figured even he couldn't be imperceptive enough not to notice one was coming at some point in the near future. He simply didn't know it'd be this soon.


End file.
